Charcot-Marie-Tooth? Did God See My Disappointment?

“Contemplating the Diagnosis”
Photo by Martin Péchy from Pexels

I had put off being diagnosed with Charcot-Marie-Tooth (CMT) as long as I could. However, the pain in my feet and lower legs had gotten so bad by age 22, that I needed to find out if it was CMT, or something else.

The doctor gave his diagnosis and I was right as expected. It’s CMT. He gave a prognosis of not being able to walk after age 40, would be using a wheelchair, that I should never run, should not do this, should not do that, and the list went on and on. Of course, being a young man and in college, sex was always on my mind but the doctor didn’t say much about the subject.

I left the doctor’s office pretty upset and disappointed. It seemed that my life was crushed or over. Everything was falling apart. I wanted to finish college, find a good job, find a wonderful woman to marry, and live happily ever after in our 4-bedroom home with 2.5 children and a dog. That seemed to be disappearing.

Most of the guys I knew or had seen in classes at college were in great physical shape. They were athletic, happy, and able to do just about what they wanted to do. I wanted that. However, it wasn’t going to happen.

When I look back, I believe that God had heard my silent cries of disappointment, and, hey, maybe even angry tears. I didn’t blame Him as it just never really occurred to me to do so and probably because to me, that was disrespectful. I don’t remember praying about it either. I wouldn’t see the extent of what God heard, saw, or felt until I went back to college in the fall.

After the diagnosis, I went back to what I was doing in life. Playing, working, running, and doing whatever. I went back to college in the fall as I wasn’t going to give in to this disease!